Thursday, September 18, 2008

the stess factor

today i am going to try and not ramble about the stress factor in caring for someone with Alzheimer's.

for me i think no i know my mom has more stress about this than i do. i didn't realize until we started caring for Granny just how badly it affects her. she lets everything get to her now. i mean stuff used to bother her but now she just doesn't cope as well.

she worries all the time. about her job and my grandmother and her great grandson and my kids and the list goes on and on. i know that there are alot of people out there with just as many or more worries that she has but when i look at my mom i can see how all this has taken a toll on her. i read that in most cases the caregiver will die before the patient. i can only help out so much but this is her mom and she is going to worry.

you stress over everything. is she eating, did they wash her hair, are they cleaning her properly, how did she get this bruise or that cut and on and on until you almost go crazy. i take photos of every cut or bruise granny gets. it's the only way to make sure she isn't being handled too rough. that is another worry. are the people moving her around trained in the proper way to lift a person?

granny was in the hospital last month for a week due to a bacterial infection. she hasn't been the same since. she gets tired easily and her appetite has dwindled down quite a bit. so now that is yet another worry. will they recognize this if it reappears? she lost 20 pounds in one month. not good i don't care how healthy you are. most of the loss came during the infection before she went to the hospital. thank God her appetite is picking back up.

another worry is do you have a DNR or not? if not and something relatively simple in medical terms happens will they try CPR or just let her go? if you do have one will they just let her starve to death or what? my friend whose husband has this told me a person can live up to 3 weeks without fluid. can you imagine going 3 weeks without so much as a drink of water because your family has a DNR on you? this is a decision my mom and i are really struggling over. this is her mom and i cannot tell her what to do. all i can do is try to stay informed so i can keep her informed. if it were me i don't know what i would do so how can i advise her as to what to do? i just pray this is a decision we don't have to face.

2 Comments:

  1. Anonymous said...
    I know what your mom is going through. My father has Vascular dementia he has lived with me for 6 years but in the past 18 months he has taken a turn for the worse. My family tells me I am no longer the same person and I feel they are right. I stress and worry over everything, I think i am depressed but I don't know what to do.
    Inge' said...
    i have encouraged my mom to talk to her doctor about her stress and depression. she has not done so yet.
    i think counseling helps if you can find a good one. Also maybe a mild anti-depressant.
    talk with your doctor first about what you are going through before you make any decision about what is best for your health.

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