Wednesday, October 8, 2008

How God views me

i was talking to a friend of mine today and she told me a very sad, thought provoking story today. she is reading a book of devotions and this one particular story she shared with me has left me thinking of my own arrogance and how i think God should see me versus how He really sees me.

the story takes place in India. The tuberculosis rate in India is the highest in the world. They also have a high rate of poverty.homeless people who contract TB are taken to "a house for dying" in Calcutta. they are given clean clothes hot food and a place to die. their heads are also shaved.

they have these jars or buckets that you cough into. they pass this jar around for all to use. they also have people with leprosy there. syringes are used over and over to remove fluid from their sores.

the old clothing, jars, hair, syringes, and dead are place out back for pick up. because of the high number and the type of diseases, the bodies and all belongings are burned.

i know this is a very graphic picture, but this is reality for a lot of people.

the missionary in the book is visiting one of these houses and goes out back. he sees children going through the dead looking for clothes to wear and sifting through the other garbage looking for food. he realizes that this is the only clothing or food these children have.

he goes on to say that in our self-absorption we think we are living the life God would have us to live. in reality, we are living in the dump digging for food. our lack of faith and unwillingness to do what God would have us to do causes us to live a sub-standard life. i know for me personally i let fear of the unknown keep me from doing a lot of things God would have me do. this is a lack of faith which is sin in the eyes of God.

in my arrogance and pride i have told myself that if i am God's creation, how could He possibly be ashamed of me? i have tired to blame God a lot in my life for my own choices. it took awhile for me to realize that God does feel ashamed of me. i was brought down a peg or 2 when i read that. (Isaiah 54:7-8)

as i grow closer to God, i realize that i will never be what He desires me to be as long as i am here. God sees the finished product. He knows what i will be despite who i am today. i don't use this knowledge to excuse my choices in life. i am held accountable for the path i choose.

because of the sacrifice of Jesus, i now have a High Priest that makes my prayers holy before God. to know that Christ is my advocate is a great comfort to me. while i do know that my life will never be what we think of as successful (big house, lots of money, power,etc), i take comfort in the fact that God wants only the best for me. i just have to learn how to step out on the limb i am on and trust Him.

for those of you interested in the book the title is "A Call to Die" by David Nasser.


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